networks

At 9.30 pm I am exhausted and feel like I have run a thousand miles.Not surprising considering even I didnt expect to accomplish all that I finally did.
Circumstances have been such that I have learnt to live one day at a time and not think or plan for tomorrow.Yesterday the doctors threw up their hands and told me that I would have to take my father home,except that it came with conditions.full time nurse,attendent day and night,feeds through the tube and completely bed ridden.Our home is on the first floor and there is no life,my mom is hardly in a state to handle such pressure.Pushed against a wall I had no choice but to swing into action.
On sunday I was a hysterical mess,not sure if I could handle all this,completely broken,but yesterday I put it all behind me.Told myself that there were people in worse situations and that I had to get on with it.So the leader in me got into the act.The elder sis was deputed to hospital duty and prayer(this she did on her own and it worked wonders).
I first found a nursing service,then a supplier of hospital cots(he never understood why I called it a bed and I was in no mood to argue),then a cleaner(who didnt turn up so we ended up doing it ourselves)Finally a 24 hour ambulance service.
I am not sure how I kept my cool but I did and right now I am feeling rather proud of my self