Keeping up with old age

Having lived with old people for a while now and being associated with many 80 plus category of people,I consider myself a bit of an authority on handling them. Looking at small children and old people reminds me that old age is indeed a second childhood. Points to remember with old people. By and large with a few exceptions ofcourse ,most old people are difficult. Not that they mean to be so though some do but the point is that the end of ones lifetime comes with it's own set of rules and anxieties. However well one has lived it is difficult to let go,to be ready for death,very few of us are. So fear is a big deal here. I watch my one year old nephews being monitored by a baby monitor and wonder if I should get one for my mum but therein lies the difference. At one ,you don't know you have privacy,you don't really care if someone is watching you provided you get food and rest on time. But if you've lived as long as my mum has then you want your privacy,you guard it because it's a measure of how much in control of your life you are so you don't want to be under surveillance . Small children haven't developed their tast buds as yet but when your old you've had a life time of choices and tastes,and with taste buds declining all you have are memories of taste but you know good food from bad. Most old people like routine,there is an orde in their lives which helps them stay in focus. Take that away and you have a helpless person on your hands. The routine is something they will create but athe person they are living with must create an atmosphere in which to create this routine. Younger people have to work around the older persons routine not the other way around except in circumstances when one knows that the older person needs help. Dignity is a big deal,I have seen young people yell instructions to older people like they are dumb or incapable of understanding . Far from the truth,it's patience that one need not decimal levels. If someone is hard of hearing yes by all means talk louder but don't shout down at them. Sometimes as one gets older it's harder to articulate ones needs or in some cases one is not aware of what's good for one. Then step in and help,try as far as possible to help older people make their own decisions. My husband often wonders why I ask my mum so many questions after giving her a lot of information,be it visiting a doctor or eating something,well I have understood that this makes them feel more in control and a dialogue is far better than a one sided conversation.

If one is living with and old person one must have loads of patience,plenty of understanding and a support system of friends in similar positions who will understand what one is talking about.