Eleven years

Eleven years is a long time in this day and age to stay married and we seem to be close to accomplishing this near impossible task.Today's newspaper talked of a young 20 something jumping off the fifth floor because she was denied a cigarette (life is that inexpensive today),another young couple were ready to call it quits because the recession was taking its toll.All around me the signs of recession is alive and kicking and its toll on marriages is scary.Unfortunately it seems to be affecting the young upwardly mobile couple who seem to have it all,house,car,cute baby,double incomes(until recently),life style as defined by blackberry,pup visits,eating out and getaways.So what keeps the 40 somethings like us stay together.Don't we have problems,don't we have fights?.Of course we do.The husband and i have been fighting and arguing over the silliest of things for the past eleven years and for some six years before when we thought we were friends but could fight to kill each other.Of course over the years,the quality of fights (like everything else in the world) has come down.Now we actually give in and agree (which I must admit is a tad boring,nothing like a good fight to release stress I would say).There are no gifts now,(being at home means there is no requirement for perfume,clothes etc)no eating out(since I discovered my culinary talents)but our house is always filled with family and friends and everything that we like.After eleven years we don't need conversations,the husband is glued to tv and  yours truly is content with books,cooking and reading(all done in separate rooms so as not to disturb the quality of our pursuits).Its enough to know that the significant other is a shout away.We still do vegetable shopping together(its nice to have someone carry the bags)Our driving roles are reversed but not without the constant lesson on good driving skills that the husband insists on giving,to which I have learnt to turn a deaf ear and when the monologue gets too much I step on the gas and the husband is reduced to silence and gets his voice back only when we reach home.To the young people of today we may come across as staid,uninteresting and lacking in life but we never in these eleven years (during the worst of times) felt the need to dump each other for a better life.We had all or more of the problems that most couples face but maybe it was good parenting on our parents part,maybe it was the fact that everything we own we had to work hard for,maybe its the fact that in a relationship with so little conversation,we still managed to communicate and understand and maybe just maybe we have got some of our priorities right.Not to be judgemental but in today's world everything is about speed.Get richer faster,grow faster,dump faster and jump around jobs,relationships and everything else.Sound so exciting and so full of possibilities but where does it all end.....something the best things in life come slowly and to wait for it is the best part of living.There is not going to be flowers,chocolates and moonlight tomorrow,more likely it will be dirty washing,watering plants,veggie shopping and some quality time in the kitchen but that's happiness and after eleven years I couldn't ask for more